Slutever

Slutever is the alias of 23 year old New Yorker turned London squat dweller Karley Sciortino who also features on Vice, Dazed and has recently begun writing a blog for Platform. Whilst previously Karley lived in a squat affectionately known as Squallyoaks with other artists/musicians/prostitutes, according to the latest entries times appear to be changing as the gang have been evicted from their old home and whilst some appear to have found a new place to live, several members have gone their separate ways. So now seems as good a time as any to recap on my some of my favourite moments from the Slutever blog which will be hard since it's all COMEDY GOLD so I could probably turn this into a series or something...I won't though since that would be pretty lame.

- Moon Cup, or being doused in the DNA of a mildly overweight lesbian, a romance of sun, sea, sex and environmentally friendly medical devices.

- Next on the list, Shark sex, which makes me wonder if she reads Fuck Yeah, Sharks if not she totally should


- Jail, A terrible indictment of our legal system? Or why picking fights when you are totally wasted is probably not a good idea even if they deserve it.

- My new sex BFF, a cautionary tale of what might happen if you try being open about you know what, to you know who...If you know what I mean? Bit of a long shot really.

- Another just as important life lesson is importance choosing your wrestling opponents carefully, it could end in you being accused of rape, or being stabbed with a makeshift trident.


- One thing I've always liked about Karley is her ability to make even the most sordid fantasies sound like a walk in the park or a drive through apple country with a bearded twenty seven year old and her dedication to gynecological experimentation.


- I smell dead people, highlights why exactly hospitals can seem like the worst places on earth and don't let scrubs or Grey's anatomy tell you otherwise.

- What is an STD? a terrifying tale of razor lined genitals and the morning after pill, there are so many quote in that particular entry I could take out of context and they'd still be funny, I won't though just to make sure.

- Art Slut, just because I bet most car models don't get the chance to meet Hugh Grant or Jarvis Cocker or for that matter get attacked by women with armpit hair, JEALOUS.

So those are are some of my slutever highlights, although in all honesty this entry could be twice as long, but I decided to leave it there in the hope that by shrinking the entry slightly there might be a chance more people will be inclined to finish reading it.